got smarts?

I read this article and found it very interesting. It basically talks about how telling your children they're "smart" can actually be damaging and it can cause the them to not try difficult things or take risks in fear of failure and not being "smart" anymore. The article instead talks about how we should praise their hard work and that it's their perseverance that brought them to their achievement, not being smart.

I actually completely agree with this for the reason that I have personal experience with it. I was a "smart kid" in early elementary years and I remember so vividly my teacher putting me in the "smart group" in 1st grade. We were given more difficult assignments than the rest of the students because, well, we were smart. I remember one of the assignments that my teacher gave me completely confused me and I had no idea how to do it. Instead of asking anyone or my teacher for help, I kept it to myself and just didn't do it because I didn't want anyone to think that I wasn't smart anymore. So instead of working hard to understand and learn which was what originally had given me my smart title, I forfeited those qualities in fear of losing my smartness.

So future self, don't praise kids for being smart, praise them for working hard and being diligent and fearless :)

war

My body is currently under siege by a ruthless and cruel monster named the flu.
I would not recommend this for anyone. Pondering things like, "should I shower?" or, "do I have to get out of bed to eat?" are sadly very daunting questions. I literally can't remember the last time I felt this way, I don't think I've ever. 
I will say that I'm very grateful I have a body that can heal itself and functions properly. I can't imagine being sick like this all the time, I definitely feel blessed.

influenza

I've never been all that big on hand sanitizer and flu shots, but after coming down with the flu and feeling the way I do... I'm going to be a chronic hand sanitizer user. This is awful.

On a happier note, I love this song. You should listen and enjoy and be happy that you're healthy (if you're healthy of course).

inspired

I'm feeling very inspired by these beautiful images. I love how low key they are and the soft quality of light. They are so lovely, mysterious and peaceful. This is the direction I'm aiming my work to go, there's something so enchanting to these types of images. I just love them.

Photo credit 
Top: Chris Ozer
Bottom Left: Sverrir Thorolfsson
Bottom Right: Vaughn Teegarden

to shave or not to shave?

What do you think? Buzz Miss Marley? She is just so darn hairy and this is what she'd look like... not too bad I think...

saying goodbye

My Dexter love is now living with Jordan.
I can't tell you how hard of a decision this was to make. Dexter is mine, he's my puppy, my baby.... but it's for the better and thankfully, only temporary.
I didn't realize how manageable he made living in this house until he was gone. This house is so lonely and haunted by miserable memories. Guy has been helping me to remodel the kitchen which is definitely helping, I did a lot of painting over the break and the kitchen remodel has changed a lot of the house. I don't think I could handle living here if everything was still the same. If I choose to, I can sell this summer which is relieving to say the least. It wears at my spirit to live here, but I would like to believe that I've been handling it well and I've had a lot of support from close friends and family which I am eternally grateful for.

My Happiness Project is going well, I know it's already been a day, but I'm noticing a little difference in my mentality changing and it's exciting. I'm tired of my life and determined to change it :)

project happiness

Ever since I got divorced, I've struggled with being happy. So often I feel heavy, clouded and burdened. It's very frustrating to me because I feel that I'm a generally happy individual who loves life. However, that hasn't been the case so much over this past year or so.
Recently I watched this Ted Talk by Shawn Achor. He conducted a study at Harvard called the happiness advantage showing how in our society, happiness is so often connected with achieving a certain level of success but because we're always pushing ourselves to be better, we never achieve "success" and consequently never achieve happiness. He then tells that it is our daily habits and behaviors that impact our happiness and that if we change them, we will be happier in our day to day lives while striving for success instead of having happiness as our end goal. Shawn then gives an exercise to do everyday for 21 days that he claims will increase your happiness. The exercise is really simple, this is what you do:

-Write down 3 things that you are grateful for. They have to be unique for each day so be creative.
-Journaling. Include in your journaling a positive experience you've had in the last 24 hours.
-Exercise for a minimum of 10 minutes.
-Meditate for a minimum of 2 minutes focusing on clearing your mind.
-Do one random (but still intentional) act of kindness.

I really like this idea and I've decided I'm going to try it. I've made a few tweaks though, included in my journaling I want to write about how I've seen the hand of the Lord in my life and I also want to include prayer and scripture study to this daily routine.
And so with that, starting today, Project Happiness commences. I've going to post updates to see how well these "exercises" are working for me and you are all welcome to try it with me if you'd like :)

Here is a link to an article about this video if you don't want to the watch the Ted Talk.

family

I adore my family (as I'm sure most people do), they make my life bearable and happy and at times, very funny so I thought I'd share a few recent stories about how they make me laugh.

This thought first though... my little sister went through the LDS Timpanogos Temple yesterday for the first time. It was a beautiful experience that I am so happy I got to share with her. I'm proud of her for the choices she's making in her life right now, they're hard ones to make but very respectable and very admirable. I can't believe she leaves in less than two months.

After the temple, we went out to dinner as a family to Texas Roadhouse. Bless my mother's heart, she hates when the kids (my dad included) don't act "appropriate" while dining at a restaurant. It is the bane of her existence. And to my mother's horror, my sister shot the straw paper casing at my dad but missed and hit a lady in the booth behind us. I have never in my life seen such a piercing glare come from my mother's eyes. And while my sister was squirming in pain from the burn of the death rays coming from mom, the rest of us were rolling in our booth laughing. Jessy then continued to spill food on her lap multiple times, text, fork her steak fisted like a caveman and rip a bite from it, and try to eat with her napkin tucked in her collar.
Mom vowed to never take her out to dinner again.

My dad sometimes mixes up words or phrases. Here are some of my favorites that I've heard up to date.
Tweeter for Twitter.
That Biber kid for Justin Bieber.
Breakfwrast for breakfast (he will deny it to his grave but I swear he says breakfast with a 'w').
And my personal favorite:
Bedoodled and bejingled for bedazzled.

And lastly for now.


I was driving with mom on Christmas Eve doing some last minute shopping when she started slowly driving in circles in the parking lot loudly proclaiming that she was a rebel and actin' crraaazzzy!
I was very confused...
... until I realized that she thought she was doing doughnuts.

moonwalk

This film is so beautiful and the moon is absolutely enchanting.