1.15.2012

oh the woes of being single... again.

I got a calling. I'm the ward prayer girl. I'm actually really excited about it, it gives me a chance to meet a lot of rad new people :)

I've been really frustrated with the idea of dating lately (I say idea because the actual dating part doesn't really happen much). I feel like there's no way that I'm going to find a man who's single, interested in me and meets the standards and qualities that I want in a guy. Because if this man who meets the standards I want in a husband or boyfriend or whatever does exist, he's surely taken by someone fabulous or (like a recent past experience) isn't interested in dating me...
And I miss it. I miss being someone's other half. I miss companionship and having someone love me so much that I'm their world and they are mine. I miss being adored and being able to adore in return. I miss having someone that I can turn to no matter what, someone that I can depend on and lean against. I miss falling asleep next to the man that I've promised to spend my life with and waking up to his face in the morning.
Sometimes I wonder which would be worse, never having the opportunity to taste the joy of marriage in this life or having had it for a brief moment and then having it ripped away.

This isn't me throwing a pity party for myself, this is me just being temporarily frustrated. I'll get over it.
Bleh.
Anyways..
Dating sucks. That's basically the point of that paragraph.

On a happier note... I got accepted to the Europe program! Woo! I'll be in France, Spain and England for a little over a month or so this May. It's going to be amazing and I'm beyond excited to be studying photography with awesome people in awesome countries. Now I just need to make money. So, if anyone has photography needs or knows someone who has photography needs, you should pass my name along because I'm kinda swell and I'd really appreciate it :)

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