living

I have a very long bucket list. And everyday I get older, I realize more and more that there aren't enough hours in the day or a lifetime to do everything that I want to do... it depresses me at times. I want to do it all and it's sad knowing that it's not possible.
Want to know a portion of my bucket list?

- I want to learn to sing.
- I want to learn to dance.
- I want to learn to...
          play the cello.
          play the piano.
          play the guitar.
- I want to be brilliant at graphic design.
- I want to be a moving writer.
- I want to...
          travel the world with film cameras and meet people from different cultures.
          be an incredible rock climber and climb amazing mountains.
          learn to swim.
          compete in an Iron Man contest and perform well.
          be an incredible fine art photographer that exhibits in well known galleries.
          master every historic process in photography.
          get my MFA in photography and teach at a university.
          learn how to weave.
          learn how to make lace.
          learn how to beatbox.
- I want to read every classic book and every book that has ever interested me.
- I want to learn calligraphy and letterpress and do both well.
- I want to make enough money that I can...
          own a home that is used as a safe haven to let battered women to take shelter.
          aid an organization in educating the public on the importance of spay and neutering their animals                   and provide those services for free.
          leave $100 tips for waiters/waitresses that are especially sweet to me or look like they need it.
          leave money in vending machines for people to stumble upon.
          give anonymous equipment donations to photography students in need.

- I want to raise a family....

If I had to pick one thing, I would obviously choose the last one.
Have you ever heard the joke that when a couple gets married, the "baby switch" turns on for the wife? It was very much true for me. Except I got divorced and that switch never turned off. I would love for a family more than anything but I have no opportunity for that anymore (or at least hopefully just right now). I guess I'll just have to wait and see where my life goes. Patience you say? Psh. Ya right. There's no time for patience ;)

“It’s not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly…. Who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.” -Teddy Roosevelt


“Do not lose hold of your dreams or aspirations. For if you do, you may still exist but you have ceased to live.” — Henry David Thoreau